Friday, July 16, 2010
passed
It's not drinking that I'm addicted to. It's sleeping in the park that I can't get enough of.
Sunday, July 4, 2010
love hurts
today i tried to convince someone that the song 'love hurts' is actually about anal sex. i wasn't that convincing.
kids
this was the third time this week that someone has brought their baby to the office but once again my attempt to photocopy one failed.
corn
genetically modified food is a pretty crazy thing. corn is genetically modified. genetically modified corn is engineered to tolerate herbicides and resist bugs. i think these people have lost focus. what they need to work on is corn that doesn't get stuck in your teeth. that shit would sell like Nair in Italy.
fairies
as i child i used to believe that the pollen flying in the air was fairies. i don't know why i thought that but i imagine it's because some adult told me. they probably said 'look at those white things flying. those are fairies'. i won't do this to my daughter. i won't lie. i will tell her exactly what those white things are. bags of coke being sent up to heaven for god the drug fiend.
wife
some guys worry that their wives want to wear the pants in the family. not me, it's a strap on that i'm concerned about.
canoes
whenever i see an overturned canoe in someones yard i think about the memories of that canoe trip with my friends. i think about drifting along an unmanned river watching the wildlife go by. i think about the smell of the camp fire, the echoes of the camp songs and the sound that a shovel makes when it smashes against a skull.
weight
they say that some people carry the world's weight on their shoulders. all i can say to that is bend with the knees man. bend with the knees.
