elastics

today i got asked if i was bi-polar. 'i don't know what it is with you, some days you're up and other days i feel like i can't talk to you'. i smiled at her and said 'i prefer the term manic depressive'. i then proceeded to show her my black elastic band. the black elastic band is like the albino tiger of the tiger world. a rarity. i'm not sure where the black elastic band came from but i found it on the floor. it looks like the kind that is used to attach broccoli to other broccoli. it's possible that i will build a small little shrine for it to sit on and attach it to my cubicle wall. devote freaks, cripples and sick people will come from all over the world to get a glimpse. word will get out that the black elastic band cured a mans erectile dysfunction and also turned his erect penis into an excellent fresh water finding instrument. the man will return to his native land in the middle of the Sahara and will roam from village to village with his erection and lucky sweatpants finding water for the dehydrated and unbloated masses. with the fresh water they will build a factory that will make buckets so that they can make sandcastles and in those sandcastles the world's first fresh bread crouton will be born. 'it's like a crouton but soft'