they took me away

it was a squirrel chasing incident that went horribly wrong. they claimed that there was some inappropriate touching, a tail got bitten, someone lost their nuts and i was held captive for 3 months. everyday the evil squirrels would beat me with little sticks. it never really hurt but i pretended to cry and threatened to make them allergic to peanuts. squirrels are actually stupid fuckers that masturbate alot and have a strange fascination with bob barker. just cause bob wanted to save some stupid cats and dogs the squirrels think that he was the messiah. i managed to escape from the den after 62 days in captivity. i hate those fucking squirrels and how they treated me. always bringing me garbage to eat. a cantaloupe skin is not a meal. used kleenexes aren't blankets. i hope they die from squirrel aids. i hope squirrels terrorists crash planes into their trees. i hope dogs eat them and their squirrel babies with fava beans and a nice Chianti. Put the lotion on the body you fucking squirrel. armageddon is coming.