lines

if i was a drug addicted geometry professor i'd spend my days getting fucked up doing spheres of coke.

hair

i was thinking that i could take 2 empty toilet roll tubes and use them as a template when i shave. i would place them on my face and shave around them that way i could make facial "pig tails." i'm a big fan of pig tails on chicks' heads. I find them rather sexy and i don't see why facial pig tails on me wouldn't do it for the ladies.

if i grow them long enough it might even help with my balance.

mime

give a mime a fish and he'll eat for a day. Teach a mime to fish then bury him in the woods.

trees

when i was a kid i used to like climbing trees. one time when i was in the tree i watched this trail of ants walking along the branches. they were getting food and bringing it back to their nest. i thought the whole thing was pretty amazing but nowhere near as amazing as a pack of matches. i can still remember the smell.

beach

I’ve never been to a nude beach but have used the excuse that I thought I was at one.

tapper

There was a man on the bus who was tapping his forehead. He was doing it for about a minute and he appeared to be doing it as a means of relaxation. It looked like fun and made me want to tap his forehead too.

scrub

On exfoliating scrub would it be too hard for them to write 'do not use on anus' or 'what to do if anus exfoliated'. .